Failure to Launch!

This post is a difficult and emotional one for me to write.

Melanie and I rescheduled our tandem skydiving to this past weekend.  We were excited!  It was beautiful weather, warm, great weather for a jump day!  Mike at the Maytown Sport Parachute Club instructed us to show up at noon.  We were there on time, and it wasn't very crowded at noon.  John took us right into the classroom to watch a video about the risks of skydiving and to sign our lives away - I think there were probably close to 50 paragraphs we had to read and initial indicating we wouldn't sue in case of accident or death, and our heirs wouldn't sue either.

I gave Mel the opportunity to choose whether to jump first or second.  She chose first, afraid that if she waited she might chicken out.  She put on her jump suit with John and went through the drill of how to get out of the airplane and what the videographer Mike wanted her to do.  After about a 30 minute wait for others on the manifest to jump and refueling the plane. Mel, John and Mike boarded and went skyward.  About 12 minutes later, we saw them overhead exiting the plane at 10,000 feet, tine specs.  Then we saw John's drogue deploy to slow them to 120 mph (instead of 170mph) and Mike circling them taking video.  After a little less than a minute, John's chute deployed and Mel and John floated to earth.  Mel got to steer the parachute and they did a lot of tight turns that she said were a lot of fun.  They landed without incident and Mel was all smiles.

While Mel was in the air, Chuck and I suited up and Chuck walked me through what was expected to get into the tandem rig and exit the airplane.  There was one flight manifest between Mel's jump and mine.

When Mike got his chute repacked, he walked over and talked to me about the video and what I should do when we were freefalling.  We waited for another manifest in front of us to jump and the plane to refuel, then it was our turn.  We had another lady with us in the plane who took a "short jump" at 4,000 feet.  She looked like she was in her 60's, and she indicated she had jumped about 6,000 times since she started in 1970.

It was a breath of cool fresh air when they opened the door at 4,000' feet and she jumped.  They closed up the door and we started our climb to 10,000 feet.  It takes a while.  The scenery was beautiful! 

I made a mistake when I put on my jumpsuit.  Due to ALS, my mouth alternates between too much saliva and being totally dry.  I remedy the dryness and stifle the urge to gag by sucking on small sugar free lozenges.  I had quite a few with me, and I put one in my mouth before I got my jumpsuit and tandem harness on.  However, I neglected to plan ahead, and having waited almost 30 minutes with my jump suit on before boarding the plan, my lozenge was gone shortly after the lady jumped and I had no more at hand - they were buried in my pants pocket and inaccessible.  Maybe if I had a drink before I got on board I would have been okay, maybe not.

Normally, this wouldn't be too bad, but with my heightened excitement (okay, I was appropriately scared) about jumping out of a plane, I started feeling like I was going to gag on our climb to 10,000 feet.  That happens to me fairly often these days, but the lozenges work well.  Unfortunately, I couldn't access them in my pocket with my harness and jumpsuit on.  I started gagging around 8,000 feet and thought I might vomit in the back of this small plane.

Chuck was concerned and told me if I had to vomit to do so in my helmet - they don't carry barf bags like a commercial flight and it would be a real mess and ruin everyone else's afternoon if they had to smell it on their ascent after my plane ride.  I didn't barf, but it was a near thing.  I felt like I was starting to get some control back as we approached 10,000 feet and felt I could exit the plane for the jump, but Chuck and Mike quickly decided that it wasn't worth the risk - for Chuck and for me.  The jump masters take their life and their passenger's life in their hands for every tandem jump, and if someone is in distress like I was, it is always safer to abort and retry.

So, after fifteen years of waiting to do the deed and jump out of an airplane, I came very close, but failed to launch.  My body let me down this time.  Obviously, I was extremely disappointed, but I respect the difficult safety call that Chuck had to make.  I was clearly in distress, and I have no doubt that he made the correct decision and credit him for doing so.

I was defeated and morose as we flew back to the ground.  Chuck and Mike were very sympathetic, and Chuck told me several times to keep my chin up.  We went back into the classroom to talk about what happened.  They gave me every chance to convince them I could use the lozenges to control the gagging and was ready to go back up and try again, but I felt that I couldn't face a second disappointment if it happened again and I was concerned that even with a drink ahead of time and several lozenges it could still happen.  So, I decided not to wait for a new manifest and try again that afternoon.

I am very happy that Mel succeeded and that she had such an incredible freefall and canopy experience.  She said she would do it again and when I am ready she will go with me again.  She should have her video later this week and I look forward to seeing it.

My third attempt wasn't the charm that I hoped it would be, but I know what to expect now and I hope that I have a chance to try again and am successful the next time.  It was definitely a life experience and a learning experience, just not the one I expected.